First, I'm so sorry to bother everyone. Since his passing on Valentine's day, 2007, this will have been the third "Gregor" thread that I've posted in this section, and I know I'm getting long-winded about it, but I don't know where else to express my feelings.
Last Christmas, my first rat and "heart rat," Gregor Samsa was alive and very healthy. He liked to get into the presents, and chew up the bows, and rip the paper. I got him a special gift for the holiday - an engraved plaque, to honor him for being "an extraordinary pet and an extraordinary soul." (It's small, rat sized.) Little did I know that it would be his one and only Xmas present, ever.
We only celebrated one birthday together, too - I got him a teeny brownie, with one candle on it, and the family, who thought I was nuts, and I sang him Happy Birthday, and I blew out the candle while he made a wish, and after he opened his presents - toys - he got to take his little cake home and eat it.
This is my first Xmas without Gregor, and I miss him so much! I think about him all the time. I never thought that this beautiful baby would only ever have one Xmas, ever. I cry a lot over it.
Of course, it's not even to be considered that I don't love my current babies "as much" as Gregor. I love all of them, Gregor, Gus, and Boo as much as anyone can love anyone. Gus is a big, squishy bundle of "pet me," and Boo is the cutest little troublemaker in the world.
It's just that I never really imagined the day that I would be without my Gregor. And now that it's Xmas and he's gone, I think about how he deserved so much better than the short life he had. He deserved to have more than one Xmas. He deserved to grow old, and to become a wizened "squishy laprat."
I was getting holiday cards for people, and in the 94Â¢ cheapie cards, I saw one of a rat angel hanging stars in the sky. I bought the card for myself. Some people might say that this was a way that Gregor was saying hello to me, and merry Xmas. I don't know. What do you think?
Thanks for listening...again.
Merry Christmas, my Gregor, wherever you are. Mommy loves you, and wants to hug and kiss you!